Top 10 worst Christmahaunkzwanzika gifts to give your girlfriend/wife

Guys, I’m trying to help you out this time. When you go shopping for your lady friend this holiday season, avoid these top 10 duds.

10. 15 flashlights individually wrapped up and tied with a bow (Who does that, dad?…)
9. Power tools (Unless your wife/gf is Kassity)
8. Every year a different, oversized goofy tshirt (Again, what were you thinking dad?)

7. Self help book (Tell her she’s fat and ugly while she unwraps it)
6. Portable car battery charger (Just plain weird)
5. Gym membership (Hey Fatty Fat Fatty!)
4. Official certificate that you’ve adopted a star in their name (So lame)
3. Edible underwear (It’s too sticky)
2. Vacuum cleaner  (I know you thought that would be number one, but…..)

1. Porn

What did I miss?

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