Tag Archives: football

Things longer than Kim Kardashian’s marriage

After 72 long and tumultuous days, Kim Kardashian has filed for divorce from whatever guy she was married to for publicity.

This woman is such a joke and her entire life is a scam. Since she doesn’t take it seriously, I thought, why should I? Let’s have some fun with this.

Trending on Twitter is #Thingslongerthankimsmarriage and there really are some gems.

Here are some of my favorites from Twitter, some of my own, and some from people I know:

Things longer than Kim’s marriage…….
…. Amy Winehouse’s sobriety
…. Rebecca Black’s singing career
…. Kim Kardashian’s E! wedding special
…. My droid’s battery life
…. Ebner’s hair

Kyle Ebner

Smooth as a baby's buttom

…. The 2011 NBA season
…. Victoria Beckham’s grocery list

Victoria Beckham "grocery shopping"

I hope she keeps a detailed list for the items she needs...

…. Phone conversations with my half-deaf Pop-Pop
…. My most recent bender
…. A Dicky V “Baaaaaby!”
…. The amount of time Taylor Swift had The VMA Best Female Video Award in her hand before Kayne took it.
…. A flight from Denver to Colorado Springs
…. The world “ridiculous” (and the amount of time it takes some people to figure out how to spell it)
…. Sarah Jessica Parker’s face

SJP long face

Too easy....

…. A Broncos’ offensive drive led by Tim Tebow

If you have some others, please, PLEASE share them in the comments. This whole thing is cracking me up.


Grinds My Gears- Go Coach Intramurals, Brother.

I know this is soooo not what my blog is about anymore. But I had to do it. I HAD to.

You know what really grinds my gears?

Dan Hawkins.

Ok, ok. I know it’s a way overdue post. I’ve kind of been sitting back, silently hating this man, afraid of karmic consequences of releasing the fury of wrath I feel for him. But the time has come. I don’t think I can stand to see ONE.MORE.QUOTE. regarding “it’s not about winning or losing.” Hey Sloppkins- It ain’t intramurals, brother.

My intramurals basketball team, The Cleaveland Steamers, took winning more seriously than he does. And you want to know what? We won the Coed Basketball Open League (for you couch potatoes, that’s the highest league) CHAMPIONSHIP every semester. That’s what happens when it’s not just about “character” and you give two sh*ts about winning!

“It’s not whether you win. It’s not whether you lose. It’s who you are and how you operate. … There are going to be some things in your life not so good, and how you deal with that is really, really important.

The great thing is, I think they hang to that message and they cling to that message and they believe in that message.”-Dan Hawkins

You know what message I, the ticket holder, the fan, believe in? Winning football games. I believe in recruiting 5-Star athletes that would love to come and play at Folsom Field against some of the greatest football teams in the country in the new Pac-12. I believe in lobbying the powers-that-be into more lenient academic standards for athletes so that we can compete. I believe in rushing the field when we upset the number 3 ranked BCS team and not when we beat an unranked, pathetic SEC team and “making a tradition” out of it. I believe in being a class act and stepping down when I know that, Godammit I tried, but I just can’t help this team anymore. I believe in taking the blame when I am at fault.

But hell, Hawkins isn’t any better than any of the skeezy politicians we elected yesterday. I wouldn’t be surprised if instead of going off to coach some unknown D2 school (if they’ll take him), the Hawk enters politics. It’s much more suited for him anyways.

Let’s get the People’s Choice in here, Eric Bienemy and start doing something.